Posts tagged fun

Floopy Investigates the Muscles That Help You Fuck

August 21, 2008 · Filed under Blinded by SCIENCE! · Tagged , , , , ,

Your muscles help you fuck, how about that? And it’s a good idea to keep them in peak physical condition for optimum enjoyment of bedroom gymnastics. Body shape is far less important to sex than the health of your muscles, and a curvy person can often have better muscle health than a slender person. It all depends on how you exercise and how you take care of yourself.

Like any exercise, it is a good idea to stretch a little before a marathon sex session. Even a quickie should incorporate warming up your body in some way, particularly in winter. This is part of the reason why it’s a good idea to engage in foreplay. It gets your body warm and ready for some loving. Do some yoga, chase each other around the room with dildos, it doesn’t matter what you do, so long as you get your body warm and ready for sex. It will help prevent the tell-tale “saddle walk” characteristic of the dirty weekend away, and you won’t feel so damn sore afterwards either.

The obvious areas you will want to take care of are hands, feet, thighs and buttocks. They take care of balance, as well as the whole thrusting and grinding business. Less obvious are the core abdominal muscles, which is the layer underneath the stuff you see on the ripped abs you’ve been lusting over. These also take care of balance, but more importantly, they take care of your back, making some of the more advanced tantric positions physically possible.

For a good, healthy, sex-ready body, you need to have strong core abdominal muscles, otherwise known as the transverse abdominus. You can feel these muscles underneath the top layer of fat and muscle if you press down gently in the middle between your navel & your pubic mound. The best way to tell if you’re ripped in the core is to get on all fours and make like you’re a bottom. If you need to pop a few pillows under your belly for support, then you probably need to work on those muscles. Going to a clinical pilates class or a qualified bellydance instructor will help you work on those core muscles in a safe and gentle manner.

Floopyboo

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An Interview with Mistress Bella

August 20, 2008 · Filed under Hump Day · Tagged , , , , , , , , , ,

Today I have the great pleasure of speaking to Mistress Bella, a Lifestyle/pro Domme from Melbourne, Australia.

Bella greets me first, as I reluctantly drag my sorry arse away from the search for even more stuff for my Sims, and hunker down for an in-depth discussion of what it’s like to be Mistress Bella. At this stage, I am still working on writing up questions for the interview, but that doesn’t bother Bella, so our conversation takes a casual tone while I scurry to research the topic as I’m conducting the interview. Ah, the twin joys of multitasking & conducting an interview via IM.

I begin by mentioning the stereotypical question jokingly supplied by Cynigal – “Do you get off on torturing people?” To be honest, I’m not so sure that question wasn’t directed at me, but Bella laughs it off & says that everyone asks that.

“I get off watching others get off – but not a total sexual thing more of a mind thing. (I) can’t describe the look of happiness on their faces as I do this stuff to them. I practice mental bondage as well. So a lot of eye contact during sessions…”

She says that she needs to know where her sub’s headspace is, that she pretty much does what her subs are into in her own style. Sounds a lot like wish fulfillment to me – a leather-clad fairy godmother with a whip instead of a wand, I say, and she puts me straight on that stereotype right away.

“Yeah, (it’s) very stereotyped, as leather and latex are fetishes, not a dress code for Dommes. Dommes wear lingerie – footwear depends if sub has foot fetish. I wear anything from the usual black boots to stilettos.”

Well, that totally squashes any thoughts of latex, rubber & vinyl that I used to couple with BDSM. So that’s who the lingerie section at Sexyland is aimed at. Who knew?! Since I broached the topic so nicely, I ask about the other typical stereotypes she would like to turn on their heads. It turns out that I’ve gotten the two biggies squared away within the first half hour.

Bella is a member of the FemDomme Society, having just graduated from Domme University. She now holds the rank of Madame, and aspires to be Baroness. But Domme University is merely the tip of the iceberg, as Bella believes that a well-trained Domme is a good Domme. In describing the adorably-phrased “Domme University”, Bella walks me through her transition from sub to Domme.

“Well I used to be connected to a club called Hushnow run by a Mistress Tan. She is an amazing womon. I will explain womon: as I woo no man (I) won’t use women, unless official. She ran class from her club. I first went there as a sub with my Master. I had a one on one convo with Mistress Tan and it changed my life and made me realise I was meant to be a Domme to be honest. So I asked for my release, as I was a collared sub, and became a Domme. Well, she asked me how I was enjoying been a sub so I told her I wasn’t. I told her how it felt, and things I wanted to try, etc, so she steered me in the right direction. I then started lessons with her at Hushnow and became the Domme I am today.”

Bella also values the welfare of her subs, so she also keeps her first aid certificates up to date. This seems pretty responsible of her to me, so I ask if this is standard procedure for Dommes.

“Well depends on the Domme. So do, some don’t. (There are) lots of amateurs out there. I try to keep up with what’s going on and I always research before a session. I kept my first aid certificates up after leaving the fire service”

I have this idea in my head that the sub is really the one in control as the boundaries are pretty much set by their needs, wants, or desires, so I ask.

“No. A sub gives up all rights and has no input into sessions unless there is something he wants to try.”

Damn. My rather hasty research at Kinky Dictionary was obviously sub-par. Looks like I need clarification on consent as it applies to BDSM. Thankfully, I have Mistress Bella here to set me straight.

“Ok before session I ask sub if he is there on his own free will and that everything that takes place is 100% consensual. We have session rules. A sub’s consent is basically you can do anything to him he surrenders himself to you completely.”

Oh. That makes sense. Well, I can’t really be faulted for being a noob, so I ask what advice Bella has for the toe-dipping tentative. Her advice should be taken by everyone, not just BDSM noobs.

“Well, to be honest, be careful and only try things you are 100% consensual about. It’s all about trying different things and what works for you.”

Since this is tying in so nicely with the realm of sexuality that I do understand, I ask what it is that makes BDSM different from when I play around with handcuffs in the bedroom with Mr Science.

“Lots of vanillas role play at BDSM. But to them (it’s) more of a game as they really don’t understand the concept of things. For example, what it’s like to totally give yourself to someone else. It’s all about power control and how far a sub is willing to please his Mistress. Most people have kinks and fetishes – it’s up to the person whether they take further and how far. Most just play BDSM scenarios in bedroom and others take to next level and explore further. They are the serious submissives. We also have agreements we enter into with our submissives. BDSM isn’t a game you play when you’re feeling kinky, it’s a lifestyle choice. And these kinks and fetishes come from within and that’s not something that can be taught.”

Well, that’s pretty clear. Playing ‘tie-me-up-honey’ in the bedroom isn’t the same as being a contractually obligated sub. And don’t you forget it!

Mistress Bella is currently seeking a lifestyle slave. If you are interested in contacting her, or would like to find out more about the culture, please take a look at her entry at the FemDommeSociety, or use the BDSM Wiki as a launch pad to enlightenment.

Many thanks to Mistress Bella for agreeing to be interviewed.

Floopyboo

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Floopy Investigates the Joy of Silicone Toys

August 14, 2008 · Filed under Blinded by SCIENCE! · Tagged , , , , , , , , , ,

Let me say that I am a big fan of sex toys. And this is important, because I think it makes me something of an authority on them. You must too, or you wouldn’t be here reading this stuff. Either that or you’re here looking for new fap material. Well, read on, there’s plenty of both ahead.

Surgical grade silicone is probably the most marvellous material ever that sex toys could possibly be made out of. It’s durable, pleasant to the touch, smells neutral, and it cleans up a treat.

You have no idea how great it is to know that if Mr Buzzy has been lurking on the carpet for so long he’s covered in dust bunnies & has to be pried off with a crow-bar, that you can just pop him in the dishwasher or into a pot of boiling water, and hey presto, you have a nice, clean vibe. It’s like autoclaving for the DIY lover.

Let me tell you the tale of my first silicone vibe. Actually, it was a matching pair of vibes that I bought on sale – two for the price of one – because the dank Canberra sex shop couldn’t move the stock. I was instantly in love. Those two vibes took all kinds of abuse. Hours of daily use, the aforementioned experiments in carpet-welding (a girl has to bleed sometime!), knocks, bumps, exposure to all kinds of weird chemicals that would normally break a vibe. Last year, some six years after I bought them, they died. Their motors finally crapped out. The silicone is still going strong after six years, so they have merely been delegated to dildo duty. Normally, I expect a vibe to have a bed-life of between three and six months. Not bad for $50 worth of vibes, eh?

All I can say is that even if you aren’t interested in the health aspect of surgical-grade silicone, then the pure economics of the material should steer you right towards it. You can pay up to two and a half times the cost of your average vibe for a silicone vibe that will last longer than the motor in it. You’ll have this baby for at least half a decade if you are hard on it. The average silicone vibe will have paid for itself within two years, and by the time you are on your third glorious year with Ol’ Faithful, you will have saved yourself the cost of at least one more vibe. And you still have that long again to look forward to in the life of your vibe, and that only if you plan on retiring it once the motor has worn out. In the long run you are hurting your wallet not to buy lovely, durable silicone.

Floopyboo

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Floopy Investigates What Lurks Beneath the Lab Coat

August 7, 2008 · Filed under Blinded by SCIENCE! · Tagged , , , , ,

Lab coats make me hot, so it’s probably a good thing that I’m married to a Food Scientist who Understands. Dammit, now my brain has gone to mush. Time to get Mr Science to put on his lab coat & boots & ‘inspire me’.

Well, that was quicker than expected.

Back to the science thing. There is a theory that the science fetish is related to the medical fetish, but personally, medical stuff does nothing for me. It’s kind of meh really. I’ve played doctors & nurses, and I’ve dated both, and the whole medical thing just leaves me feeling kinda blah. But get me in a laboratory & I’m wet to the knees. Maybe I watched too many movies about Frankenstein’s monster as a kid, or perhaps it has more than a little to do with my early exposure to Tim Curry’s Franknfurter in the Rocky Horror Picture Show, but something inside my loins fires off every time I see a starched white coat. It’s worse if there are gloves involved.

This is the part of the article where I google with safe search off for images to indulge my fetish…. er…. I mean facty-type stuff to write about. But aside from Dexter’s Lab porn and a billion amateur RHPS cast photos, I’m coming up blank. I can’t believe it’s such a rarity to want some mad scientist to experiment on you in the bedroom. The things I do in the name of science! Obviously more research is required.

Hmmm, I should save those cast photos for later.

Well, the internet is turning up nothing. Even Mr Science, he whose googlefu in the realm of porn is legendary, was unable to turn up anything more erotic than an admittedly hot chick in a lab coat eating a tub of yoghurt.

Must save that pic for later too.

The best thing about science is that the search for truth, or a reasonable facsimile of it, is never finished. Go science!

Floopyboo

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